Acapulco

French ppl
Party
Yelena
Irina
Issela
Steffen
Mike n Christian
Ryan n Matt two hundred pesos
Massage
Frida


Don't want to count days anymore. Let's just say that I started my journey on nov 29th.

I'm in Acapulco. Came here with Steffen who I met at the hostel and Issela from CS community.

Throughout the spending time together I have decided that they are not speaking the same as me. I'm more fast pace and experience more. They rather not experience to save money. My opinion on Steffen have changed drastically as soon as he got into his comfort zone and started showing his color. It all stArted with him opening my backpack and lying about it. Then continuation of complain and being closed minded and calling ppl stupid, not normal, or calling himself normal, uneducated.

I've learned thAt he has room for compassion however, when I got mad at Issela for keep saying "I don't know " and not listening to ppl fully, Steffen was defensive for her. Later when u cooked, he gave me money for meat and cleaned the dishes.

Looking back I had their qualities and expressed, made others angry. I remember when I was lazy, I was just free riding and it was not good. Made me dependent and unworthy.

Perhaps, now I'm being the receiving End and I am becoming more enlightened about human experience and seeing connection in people with me. Can't help to think it is a artisan trait even though I want to avoid it.

Tuesday I ended up at surprise birthday party with tons of French teachers and some Mexicans. It was a pool party and quickly turned into swimming mash. I was having more fun blasting my music and dancing. There I found my fellow party animals. Few stood out amongst them. Aurelian is French, who came to Mexico year and half ago following his girlfriend but now they are broken up and just friends. He does not leave because of lack of money. Him and I enjoyed the highs and drops in the music. He has some pictures of DJing in his FB.

Issela and I were holding hands kidding acting like a couple in ciudad de Mexico. As soon as we began our journey to Acapulco that all stopped. Steffen showed his interest in Issela and I thought it was perfect. She lied about destinations and plans. Which forced me to look for couches intensively last minute. Later I read in her phone that Tanya told her mAny times that destination is not Acapulco. I think she did do to have a romantic get away with me. We could have if she wasn't so secretive about everything in ciudad de Mexico. Don't expect me to pay for you and give you love a d mSke you happy when I don't know you. Perhaps she still recovering from her breakup. More girls I talk to, that romance relationships just run their life as if their life revolves around it. As if finding true love is their ultimate goal in life.

It's a difficult balance for me because I want the girl to love me, but I want her to be focused creating a value in life, and don't love me too much that gives me all the control, but not too independent that I would leave due to my lack of confidence in trust.

Issela free rides just like Steffen. When I ask them whAt they want, they don't know and they don't care, they don't. Want to mAke plans and they act like there is so much time in the world.. But when it comes to money, hunger, and walking they complain with ease and passion sometimes.

Perhaps they found it difficult to express themselves when i showed my colors of drive and fast paced thinking just like many idealists in the past who shy away from expressing their opinions to me.

One thing for sure is that Issela is a good person and I am very sure if it. Perhaps I get Along better with less good, but strong and independent people.

Alex told me about interacting instead of reacting by seeing the feeling that I don't want, feel it, know it then leave it. Then I will know what to do next time when that comes. She developed this philosophy for quite sometime. First time heard him say this was back in march. He is becoming a wise one who can agree and disagree with people in a gentle manner.

At the French party, many girls took interest in me. Particularly these two Mexican girls. But I assumed that it was alcohol and kept my distance. They both invited me to their home for party at different occasions although they did not know each other. Irina is a sweet girl type, nice body and kindness written all over her face. They are very attractive to me jn the beginning, but I know she will drive me crazy with weak idealist will And drive.

Yelena got much attention when she took her clothes off and jumped I the pool. She had. Rocking body.
However why I decided to meet Roth her today had more to do with her being fun playmAte. She talked about all the drugs we have tried, after I me mentioned all the ones I have done, she have done them as well plus LSD. I expressed my interest in wanting to try "quiero probar" her and friends complimented me for my espanol and confirmed that we must right now. I laughed it away. Doing LSD, being crazy high, hallucinating and going into that world in this dangerous Mexican soil with strangers was a risk that needed to be calculated with serious precaution. Definitely not when I'm intoxicated. But my desire to try still exist. My research showed similar result to mushroom, non toxic hallucinogen.

My left knee and ankle is still in pain especially the left knee. Hoping that continuation of stretching would solve it. My research suggested knee strengthening exercises such as elliptical and walking in the water.

Met American special force soldiers. One of them told me experience in killing people and his travel to Africa and middle east. His friend was with his girlfriend who is local in Acapulco. After getting to know each other thru gave me shots of tequila and beers. Matt walked up to me, shook my hand. When we separated, there was something in my hand and i knew it was money instantly. I refused, but he insisted. For my purpose of journey and well being. Some How you can't help but to notice certain connection that you develop with people. I wanted to see them again and sent Ryan a message but I have not heard back. At first I thought they were just some Rich kids from denver.

I need to travel alone more because when I'm in that space I truly do become toward humble and respectful. As of now, that's what I want to possess and develop in myself the most. Great way to happiness. Makes my world more colorful.

Stayed with Frida last two nights. She lives in well off life and drives BMW.i have a feeling we will maintain our touch. I just really need to learn Spanish more for clear communications. In English it's hard to measure what people understand and don't. Even my friends in states have a hard time understanding me.