connection

There is not a greater joy in life more than when I meet someone that I connect with not because of practical aspect or things we share in common rather feeling that I receive from sitting across from that person to flow of the conversation and how we find more things to discuss with freedom and no judgment on each other as negative connotation and discouraging.
It's beautiful see the person sitting across has something give a value not only to myself but to the public. Greater good is being accomplished because this person has something to give a value and enjoy it at the same time. Value to give to the world is practical purpose of helping the ones who are in need and take particular satisfaction out of that.
this is something deep and can be accomplished with many physical and emotion experience. Emotion is difficult than physical.  Is this because I can control the body with ease because chain reaction from motive to action is easily and readily visible?  I am observing, sensing person who trust and develop through visual objects rather than theory, knowledge and inner thinking behind it as if I have a rubic of cube that i can separate and each box contains certain information and depends on how I move the rubics cube vertical and horiozontal, each information in each box of the rubic's cube interpret different meaning but they all relate to the same because each box represent facts, the truth, logical information that are not prone to change based on feelings and are not subjectvie.

Expectation

Happiness is not something we should expect or deserve. We should not expect it. It is not something we can have. It comes and goes therefore we must cherish it as a gift, a pleasant surprise. Value it as our precious. Welcome it like a little kid when it comes, don't be disappointed when it leaves me.

Listen to the music that speaks to me. Let it.

Met an amazing person today. I hope there is a second time and I really hope that first impression is as real as second impression.

Alex told me something great today. I posted on Facebook quote. I admire and respected it. It was as if seeing myself couple years ago. I like it.

That is the reason why we connected after all.

This music is really touching me. It has been for few days. 

passion

What are you passionate about these days?

living the life to the full. rather than staying home, go out and experience. Enjoy the music and move my body. Observe strangers, listen to their stories, watch their passion grow, help those in need, encourage those who following dreams. Throw rocks at nemesis, encourage dreams.

Pay close attention to what people are saying and relate to how they feel. I may not understand fully, I do my best to relate, because that is where I magnify my experience and their experience. I contribute therefore there is a meaning to my existence and feeling is happiness.

Whatever you are, be a good one ... says Ab Lincoln.
It take ability to get to the top, but it takes character to stay there.... This is quite difficult and very rare character stays there. Many fall, that is the beauty of uncertainty.

Curiosity links to my desire to learn and figure out.
Variety Links to my desire to surprises, uncertainty, unknown, risk, fear, after effect, sense of satisfaction
Certainty links to safety, security, comfort, calm, peace, excitement, confidence, courage, self-respect.

Three words: Curiosity, Variety, Certainty may describe who i am the best.

It is a long journey to find out who I am to where I am. Perhaps it is never ending journey, there won't be an end. As much as I love to certainty and answer, I love to unpredictable consequences and subject to change.

I am honest with myself. Yet, I am not teaching myself to listen to my brain. Listening more to the heart makes me raw and primitive.

Closing door is hard. it is as if giving up. For some reason, true acceptance to leave past behind and welcoming new beginning is not that bad. It feels as I observed larva becoming a butterfly. Friends feel closer, valued, respected both ways, more people want to see me and hear about my whereabout ,goals and plans. Reconnecting, being comfortable and confident are the traces that I see as a result of truly closing the door.

Center of me there is a scar beneath lie there. It's hidden, can't see it only can feel it. It is there, no matter how many years pass, it will not go away. It will be dormant, hidden, ignored and untouched. Nevertheless scar exists.

I love you because you gave it a meaning to your life. You are no longer focusing on narrow vision. You are widening it with caution. But don't be afraid, as you know, you are something special. I love you because you always look up. You may be discouraged, feel anxiety, hopeless, discouraged, rejected, unloved and ignored. not a single moment, you budged. You never gave up, you always looked up and ahead. You were lagging, crawling to the finish line of happiness. Many times you had opportunity to give up, be weak, but as you believed in yourself 4 years ago. I am Survival of Fittest. When it comes down to it. I won't let go. Accomplish the mean. Get to the goal, Finish, give a tangible meaning to the reason.

What's on your mind

With one phone call, you can set up your shop online. When you have sold something, you will get an email Authorize the email then you can begin listing all your items to your digital inventory. From here you may select where you want to expose yourself to sell your goods.

Web Application and Mobile. SAAS.

1. Has Offers Inc
2. Connections/networks to get in front of right people.

Kollektiv Turmstrasse - Grillen im Garten - YouTube

Kollektiv Turmstrasse - Grillen im Garten - YouTube

Burning Man 2012 at Black Rock City, Imlay, NV, Imlay, Nevada - Burning Man on Plancast

Burning Man 2012 at Black Rock City, Imlay, NV, Imlay, Nevada - Burning Man on Plancast

acromioclavicular

acromioclavicular shoulder separation, tore a ligament for the first time. Went to emergency room for the second time in my life today. 

play game

playing with someone's emotion. Seeing the vulnerability through what they complain about, their tone of voice, body language, excitement and confidence relate to louder and firm tone. Subjects or stories that represent insecurity do not come to voice easily and fades fast. Using someone as tool by taking advantage of their respect, trust and loyalty. attempt to control a person

Understanding human emotion is as if great power comes with great responsibility. Many people attempt, many fail. Many mind their own business, stick to who they are, honest to others and as long as there are good intentions it will all be at peace and work towards betterment of mankind and share with people of clicks.

Understanding human emotion can inspire and motivate people to achieve great things that adds value to mankind. start with few people, eventually an army and a mountain.

Understanding human emotion can capture that person into a prison that she doesn't even know about. Give her the pain of loneliness, sweetness of connection, and thirst for more.

boredom exerts our mind to creativity. Study and dig deep while you can. It won't last forever. Living the both ends of the spectrum is what you've always been preaching. You will not enjoy this. You will appreciate this. If you are not living on the edge, you are taking too much space.


We achieve victory as a team. I will die as an individual. I only have 60-70 more years to live if everything go as planned. I may not make it that much. I've already lived 26 years. Looking back and looking forward. What does this mean to me? It means that I have done these experiences and met these people and I reside in Seattle and I can create a pie chart and bar graph to measure who I am connected to and how much based on time and feeling toward individuals. Their title is 'friend'

Don't waste my time on jealousy or envy. There is much more to it. It's a marathon. Some days you are ahead. Some days i'm behind. At the end, it's not about the destination, its about the journey. Making most of it will start with myself feeling content and passionate.

This year. I did not wish for same thing that I've always wished  for. What changed? nothing changed that is why. I wanted change deep inside of me. Living in happiness for far too long that I wanted to misery too. Is this who I am? what about balance. What about my goals? Far too long i've lived in a box. The real journey begins here. What's holding you back? what's bothering you? what is in the way.?

Let's do an exercise we very good at.

Begin with end in mind.

What do I want? I want to know what I want the most, my deepest desire

What do you require to make this happen.

Well. I could sit for hours and mediate with my eyes closed and see what I find. I could eat some mushroom. I need to be challenged and enjoying at the same time. Survival mode kicks in, nothing can stop me, I can always figure things out and support myself.

What do I need to do to feel this way?
I need to do. Act. ACtive. Activate. I already know what decisions to make. Answer is simple. Do it and do it fast and hard. Focus.

What do I need to feel active, focused and fast.
I need to commit to my goals and plans.

How will I commit to my goals and plans, what cause them to fail?
lack of drive, i'm not really going after what I want. going after what I want is meaningful but there is no defined answer, timeless, unknown, little control.

Success comes in cans, failure comes in cants


doing great with saying yes, now can we expedite this yes to hell yes? passion. interest.

Betrayal is only an illusion 

Deal

My deals are starting to perform better. Some takes me by surprise. Some blow me away. Majority however fits where they belong.

Past weeks has been great transition. I feel closed off emotionally, guarded, content and I feel the sense of excitement more often. I am not sure if this has to do wit training and thinking or a natural process. I can see both sides.

Decision on travel still stands. I was uneasy today because I realized that I signed up for full marathon for thx giving weekend. It was going to be a very important experience and I have put a lot of thought and commitment into it prior to purchase.

There are many things to be appreciated all around. I appreciate great summer. I have never played so much in one summer as this one. Perhaps I played when I was a child during the summer but I don't remember much. Perhaps I played transition between high school to college. Yes that was the last time I really played. I have forgotten what it is like to play hard. There are definitely few people who I appreciate because they all had something to do with this feeling that I am having. It feels like a accomplishment. Accomplishment that has nothing to do with the ambitions and goals that I had for myself and my life. This is new and unexpected.

I've made that deal. Deal with my ambition and happiness. Lazy with activity.
Human emotion is the most powerful tool to drive and influence an individual. It is matter of one's ability to control the emotion regardless of letting it go to its highest or hold it tight as long as possible. Which one am I? still trying to figure that out. I do know one thing is that I'm not settling. I don't want to. why? I don't know. I thought it was human nature but there are people who shows me otherwise.

I envisioned what it would be like to travel alone. I decided to take her offer and go shopping downtown. Showed up early, started to walk, wandered around, it was boring. I got hot, started to sweat. I started looking for shorts. Then shopping became fun. A goal that I believed to be needed, a problem that needs to be solved, a practical problem and solution. It makes sense in my head. This prevents from becoming tedious.

Standing up for myself again. However, I feel cautious to become my old self. I want to be right and strong, but I want to be adaptable and flexible more. I want to be confident but I want to be kind more. I want to shine and be admired, but I want the good character in me more. I want to be rich, but I want to share my life experience more. I want to be happy with my life  but I want to appreciate the life more. I want the knowledge, but I want to feel the stimulation more. I want to be apathetic to people who are weaker than I am, but I want them to be inspired to become strong more. I need to sleep but I don't want to sleep. I want to run marathon, training for it day by day, challenge mentally and physically, find out more about myself who I am, but I want to train myself to make myself become who I want to become. It maybe a  month or a year but I just need to make one thing clear as a primary goal. NO REGRET. Make sure that I accomplish the mean, the goal, desire, all of the above.

When I am hurting, I must hurt all the way because as time goes by, wounds scab, pain is lessened, give it some time, it all heals. Time heals all wounds. It's ok. it's meant to be. Precious life can't be all wasted for mourning because there is something more important. The joy, happiness, excitement, richness of love, stimulation, ecstasy, my own utopia, share and share some more. These are wonderful traits of life that everyone should aspire to achieve and acquire. However it is only possible with pain. Bigger and deeper the pain I go through, more and longer I remember, shapes me to become the person everyone likes, admires and respect. Pain bring maturity in me, but don't let it keep me from being true to myself. Don't let it get in the way, let it guide and build a path. That is the deal we make. Some choose to go all in on one big pot. Some deal small but often. Which one am I? which one are you?

Decision day

Citizenship

Korea

Europe – cistine chapel. Rome. Paris.

Sell all the goods.

Mt rushmore. Yellowstone. New York. Virginia,

Research – destinations

Africa –

China = Great wall

Japan

MONEY

Debt, -car payment, insurance, cell phone, student loan.

Deals

Plane tickets

destination plans - 

First week of Nov